Moving forward.

We have been obtaining paperwork to provide to our social worker and meeting with her to complete our homestudy. Our last meeting with her is scheduled for this Sunday when she will visit our home. After that, she will be ready to write the homestudy.

To those of our friends who have taken the time to write references for us, thank you again. While we are not privy to what you have been asked to write about, we are getting the impression that it has required quite a committment in time. We cannot thank you enough for sacrificing some of your precious freetime to help us with this. We literally would not be able to adopt our child without your help. You are the best!

Lots to think about.

One of the things we have been thinking a great deal about is the fact that we will be a multi-racial family.

Well intentioned people will stare at us at the mall and the grocery store. So, we will lose a bit of anonynimity. People, without meaning to be insensitive, will ask questions like, "How much did your baby cost?" I am already prepared to retort with "How much was your hospital bill when you had junior?" We do not fear these issues, but know that it is something that we have to be prepared for.

We also have to expect that people with bad intentions will make unacceptable comments, etc. It will be very important to learn how to deal with these things in a positive manner. More importantly, we will need to teach our son how to as well. Neither one of us has ever really experienced prejudice to the degree that our son might. It is not that either one of us has ever condoned such activity, it is just that we have always been part of the majority.

We have a long time to learn and think about these things. Does any of this shake our conviction that this is how we are meant to start our family. Absolutely not. I am confident that when we bring our son home, we will be ready to begin living our lives as a family.

The Vault and Pizza

We had scheduled our first meeting with our social worker to occur last night. We arrived about five minutes early and approached a very lovely office building attached to a senior living facility. The sign near the road showed that we were in the right location.

I had been specifically told that the agency had evening hours on Monday, which is why I was a bit surprised to see that there did not appear to be anybody inside.

I attempted to open the door, but it was locked. The doorbell may have worked, but we could not hear anything. Upon closer inspection I realized that this place was Fort Knox. The glass was about 18 inches thick (ok, I am exaggerating). I saw another thick glass door that we would have to get through, keypads, voice boxes and I was wondering if we were going to have to undergo retinal scanning to gain access. I looked at the sign again to make sure we were in the right place. This joint was a vault.

After about ten minutes of waiting I called information to get the agency phone number because we did not have it with us. I was forwarded to an answering service and had a very nice conversation with a lady who was nowhere in the vicinity. She might have been in a different timezone. All I knew was that she could not help us. We were becoming convinced that there had been a miscommunciation. Karin's feet were bothering her so we decided she should sit in the car while we waited a little longer.

I realized that there were three people meeting in a room near the front of the building so I waived and gesturing for attention. A guy who, like the answering service lady also didn't work for the agency, opened the doors for me. He couldn't tell me if our social worker was around, but I was in!

In one of the more embarrasing moments of the night, I held the interior door open with my right foot and the front door open with my left arm gesturing for Karin to come from the car. I was now obsessed with these doors and never wanted them to close again. Karin saw me and began the 75 yard trek or so. After way, way too long of a period of time, I realized that I didn't have to hold the doors open. I was inside. Imagine the slow voice in my mind reasoning after a long day, "you can just open the doors from the inside like the guy did for you when Karin gets here"

We are going to fail this homestudy.

We still had to figure out where the heck to go, had no receptionist to greet us, and a vault door to deal with. Victory? A person could be seen through opaque glass inside of the vault! She opened the door and I exclaimed probably with a little too much excitement, "Erin?!"

"Uh, no, who are you?" Sigh. I explained why we were there and she said she would "try" to find our social worker. Try?! How big is this place?

She was successful. Apparently, the receptionist is usually there on Monday night, but not this one. Our social worker was probably sitting inside her office looking at her watch and wondering why these jerks were ten minutes late when she probably wanted to go home. She didn't know the receptionist had left and was just getting ready to call out to see if we were there.

It all worked out and our meeting lasted about 35 minutes. When Erin asked if we had any more questions, I considered asking if we could keep our money in her office instead of our bank. The place was SECURE. I didn't want to be a jerk so I held off. I am now wondering if our home will be safe enough for these people, though.

We ended the night with dinner at one of the town's best pizza joints. We do not get to go their very often and it was a pleasant, relaxing way to end a stressful day.

Our agency said the local USCIS office was fast.

Boy, they weren't kidding.

Our I-600A form was mailed last Saturday.

Yesterday we received the certified mail green card to show our I-600A was received by the Feds. We also received notification that we are to be fingerprinted....next week! For those who don't know, some folks have to wait quite a few weeks before they even receive notice of their appointment. The actual fingerprinting often occurs a few weeks after that. So, the folks in the goverment are processing this thing as fast as possible so far.

With our first of four homestudy appointments this coming Monday evening, we are closing the gap on getting our I-171H form and being placed on our agency's waiting list for a referral.

Now, at a time like this I probably should not take a crack at our government, however I can't resist. The fingerprints that we have to have done to get our I-171H are good for 15 months. After 15 months they don't just run them again. They make you do them again. Incidentally, they also make you pay the fee to be printed again. I guess that is a wise policy just in case my fingers get an acid wash in the interim and my fingerprints change.

In other news, I am pleased to announce the State Police has confirmed that I have no criminal history. I tell ya, it was amazing how fast I could run when I was in college. Still waiting for Karin's.....wonder what is taking them so long with her.

A lot of waiting

There is no doubt that there is going to be a lot of waiting during this process. However, we have been quite busy during the early stages.

Next Monday we have our first appointment of four with the social worker who will be conducting our homestudy.

Next Wednesday, we both have a check-up with our doctor to fill out some forms.

Not much else new to report.

Projected Timeline for Our Adoption

This is a projected timeline of the major events in our adoption process. Since adoptions from Vietnam just reopened earlier this year, the time periods under the new system are difficult to predict with precision, but based on our agency's current projections, we expect these major events to occur within the approximate ranges of time outlined below:

November 2006:
Complete home study (social worker's report certifying that we are fit to be adoptive parents).

December 2006 or January 2007:
Receive I 171H (approval from the U.S. government to adopt a foreign-born child). Upon receipt of the I 171H, we will be placed on our agency's waiting list to receive a referral of a child from Vietnam.

January 2007:
Begin the wait for a referral. The wait for a referral of an infant boy is currently expected to be 7 to 12 months. Toward the end of this period, our agency will notify us to complete our dossier (collection of official documents, such as our marriage certificate, home study report, and letter of commitment, which are translated and authenticated for review by the Vietnamese government).

Sometime between August 2007 and February 2008:
Receive referral. (This will include photographs of the child with whom we are matched, along with a medical report, which we will have the opportunity to review with a doctor before accepting the referral.) It will then be another 4-5 months until we travel.

Sometime between January 2008 and July 2008:
Travel to Vietnam for 2-3 weeks to complete the adoption and bring our child home! Our child will become a citizen upon landing in the U.S.